crazy election antics from the other side of the world

Recently, schiarire and I have:

# Drunk a lot of sugary caffeinated things, in the absence of any alcohol.

# Held races between CNN and BBC and MSN and Yahoo to see which can count faster.

# Discovered the wonder of the sparkly BBC 3D map. Oooh.

# Decided to blackmail Iowa.

# Worshipped Hawaii.

# Invented the state of North Wisconsin.

# Glared at Ohio very very hard for being so purple.. JILL WHY ARE YOU NOT TEN THOUSAND PEOPLE. WHO ARE NOT INDECISIVE.

# Wondered whether or not you can hit someone over the head with a WMD which does not exist.

This is fun, in a morbid sort of way. Better than integration, at any rate.

Currently composing love odes to the map of Wisconsin. We love you, you are so blue...

P'raps we should do one for Ohio. Why must you be pink, you dirty fink...

*looks at current music* Irony points, anyone? Like brownie points, only less sweet and chewy.

...the crack is eating my brain. If Bush wins all I will be able to say is HEE LOOK HAMSTER.

Good song, though.

call for aid!

AHEM.

Because Ji was exceedingly helpful until we got derailed by election crack, and because I know you lot have huge piles of mythological knowledge/imagination/boredom and because you know you want to help me get published and earn $125 for a 10,000 word story:

So say someone kidnapped Hope, in the form of a small blind child. Who the hell did it, and why?

Mythological characters from any culture would be preferred. If someone can work out a possible motive for the archangel Gabriel and/or Heaven to be the perpetrators or at least play a part, that would be awesome. I also liked the twistiness of the 'villain' being someone normally portrayed as or considered 'good'.

The following characters already have roles: Pandora, Kassandra, Loki, Bast, the devil.

Any ideas at all would be welcome. Frankly? The crazier, the better :) Er. Though I do sort of need to have a coherent plot.

Thank you.